alibi

Currently Reading:

The 5th Wave by Rick Yancey

Soul(s)

“WHY DO THEY ALWAYS SLICE THEIR PALM TO GET BLOOD. do you know how many nerve endings are in your hand?!?! why don’t they ever cut the back of their arm or their leg or something omfg”

me everytime a character in a movie has to get a few drops of their blood for some ritual bullshit  (via jtoday)

WHILE WE’RE AT IT, why do people try to cross those skinny bridges over lava/chasms/whatever by walking upright. IT’S CALLED CENTER OF GRAVITY. get on your hands and knees and crawl across that thing. HUG IT. SCOOT YOUR BUTT ACROSS. “but i look stupid!” lalalala but we’ll avoid that ~dramatic moment~ where you almost fall over and die because your damn fucking self wanted to look COOL

(via jtoday)

and stop yanking IV lines out of your arms the minute you wake up in the hospital 

(via panconkiwi)

That is a broadsword, why are you fencing with it

(via gallifrey-feels)

There is a freaking door right there. Stop smashing through windows, damn it.

(via intheforestofthenight)

yes, mr. action hero, I am aware that running dramatically from the baddies at breakneck speed is important, but know what else is important? NOT GETTING SHOT. RUN IN A FUCKING ZIGZAG PATTERN ON THE OFF CHANCE THAT THE MOOKS WERE NOT COACHED IN MARKSMANSHIP BY THE IMPERIAL STORMTROOPERS.

(via pterriblepterodactyls)

Oh, hey, you there, sneaky hero-type breaking into any place for any reason? WEAR SOME FUCKING GLOVES. They’re called fingerprints, dumbass. You have them and you’re putting them all over the fucking place.

(via dawnpuppet)

And people with long hair in fight scenes, PUT THAT SHIT UP!!! Jesus Christ not only will it get it your face and obscure your vision, but you’re opening yourself up for someone to grab that shit and rip you down.

(via memewhore)

That’s a fucking sword! Stop hacking at people like it’s a god damn battle axe! You’re guna break it and then you’ll be fucked

(via kinkstertime)

Oh Hello, action detective/police officer/hitman/gun wielding character. My name is trigger discipline. I don’t believe we’ve met. Now that we have, DON’T PUT YOUR FINGER ON THE TRIGGER OR THE TRIGGER GUARD UNLESS YOU’RE ABOUT TO SHOOT. Did you learn nothing from Vincent Vega?

(via daggerpen)

Stop saying people who are having a seizure are going to “swallow their tongue” so let’s cram a wallet in their mouth…you can’t swallow your fucking tongue. Your tongue CAN block your airway but don’t jam things in someone’s mouth, you muppets, THAT will block the airway just as handily. Turn them on their side, make sure they’re not going to hurt themselves on the hard floor & then back the fuck UP.

(via jeromeifyouwantto)

Posted 1 day ago With 223,741 notes

IMPERSONATE ME IN MY INBOX I WANNA SEE WHAT YOU GUYS RETAIN FROM ALL MY SHITTY POSTS

Posted 2 days ago With 43,310 notes